Joseph Writes: Haikus
Ocean Haikus by Joseph
Boats float in water.
Fish swim under the ocean.
Kids play on the beach.
Shark eat other fish.
Birds fly over the ocean.
People get sunburned.
Christmas Haikus by Joseph
Decorate the tree.
Hang lights so Santa can see.
Presents under the tree.
Lights are bright.
Santa’s coming soon.
Put out the cookies and milk.
Little Sister Forces
Maddie walked up behind Joseph and startled him–he’s rather jumpy so this isn’t actually too hard to do. “Mads! How did you do that? I mean, just walk up and surprise me like that?” He was a bit flabbergasted. I’m not certain Maddie even knew what she did, but he got a bang out of it and to me he says, “I know how she did it–she’s using her Little Sister Forces on me, that’s how.” He walks away. “Little. Sister. Forces,” he says again, laughing and shaking his head.
Cold Isolation
Joseph: I heard this story about a guy in isolation. One guy was in isolation for 50 years! He couldn’t even talk. Then another guy, he was on a street corner, isolated, but his doctors were near by to make sure he didn’t get hurt. He wanted to get attention. He was a magician.
Noah: In ice.
Joseph: Yeah. In ice. Iceolation.
Phone Book
Noah: They have this shredder at work called the Data-stroyer. It can shred anything. Supposedly, it can shred a phone book.
Joseph: A phone book, really?!
Noah: Yeah, it basically takes a phone book, turns it to dust.
Joseph: Wow, a whole phone book!
Maddie: What’s a phone book?
UPS is Coming to Town
Noah: Joseph, I heard a report from Dulles airport, and turns out the weather is going to be bad and Santa may not be able to make it through.
Joseph: No… really?
Noah: Maybe Santa can get UPS to deliver the presents.
Joseph: “Ho Ho Ho! Here ya go!”
Sweet Tooth
Maddie: Grandma got us treats. Joseph picked a chocolate bar and I got pretzels.
Me: That sounds about right. You don’t have a big sweet tooth, do you?
Maddie: No, I just have a little one. It’s this one all the way back here.
Shopping Spree
The kids got gift cards from a friend of mine. They were super excited to have their own spending money.
Joseph says, “Can we go to Target tonight??”
Maddie says, “I’m saving mine until I’m 28.”
Joseph Writes: Christmas Wish List
I would like these for Christmas
- A Bomb (?) plushy (apparently this is some kind of Angry Bird)
- A Chuck plushy (also an Angry Bird)
- A puppy
- A remote control helicopter
- White Christmas
Mistletoe Maddie
“Someone come and kiss me [stomps foot]… I’m under the mistletoe!!!”
Piano Woes
J: Mom, I want to quit piano.
Me: Why?
J: If you are good at piano, all the girls will like you…but I don’t want them to like me!
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