Joseph has renamed most of his stuffed animals Princess Fiona. They are also now all girls, as is his giant tiger, Terrence (now Teri). Sorry Nacho, Little Eddie, Yakimo Classics, Chocolate … Pictured below Princess [Nacho] Fiona.

Mom, look at the light coming through the juice! I have to pull Maddie over to see it. Mom! Come, look at the glory!

J: Damn!
Me: Joseph! We do not say words like that.
J: I was saying the kind of dam that blocks water.
Me: Ummhm. Just because you hear other people say those words doesn’t mean you can say them.
J: Daddy says damn it.
Me: I know. He has a bad habit. But I want only clean words to come out of your mouth. Not dirty words.
J: Or dusty words.
Me: Um. Exactly.

I like all kid movies. Even Dora the Explora. (Ha ha ha) That’s. Not. FUNNY!! (It kind of is.)

Pulling out of the garage, Joseph says, “Wait, mommy! Aren’t you going to put on your beauty?”

(When this is in my job description, why bother with makeup!)

Joseph was having a PB&J (after dinner dessert)…I said, You know I was talking to my friend Chris the other day and when his wife moved here from Denmark she had never tasted peanut butter! And when she first had it she didn’t like it, but after a while she did.

What did she have on her sandwich then–just jelly?

The project was gluing pressed leaves to paper. Since we were using rubber cement, I was to administer the glue and Joseph to arrange and adhere the leaves. He kept begging to “be the glue guy” though. No, no and no. I put glue on the sides of a few leaves he indicated. Then he says, “Mommy, you can glue the leaves!” I pick one up and put it on the paper. He says, “Now since you are putting the leaves on the paper, I’ll be the glue guy!” Well played sir, well played. Still, no.